Dairy Queen served its first product when it opened on June 22, 1940 in Joliet, Illinois. Although the first store was in Illinois, the actual ice cream recipe dates back to 1938 where the dessert was sold in North Dakota. On the first day of sales, over 1,600 servings were sold within the first two hours. Dairy Queen became one of the most well-known chain ice cream parlors, featuring their original "Blizzard". Today, there are over 5,600 locations across the United States. In 2001, the chain introduced Dairy Queen: Grill & Chill.
The Grill & Chill is a full service restaurant where customers order at the counter and the food is then brought to the table by servers. I made a quick stop at a local Dairy Queen to get a Mint Oreo Blizzard, and decided to add this burger to the list.
Dairy Queen? More like Dare-y Queen. Eat if you dare! I cannot express how awful this experience was for both, myself and my taste buds. Even looking at the picture, I wouldn't want to take a bite of this burger again.
Spoiler Alert! This burger receives a 9 out of 27. On the BBSR, the lowest rating for each category is a 1, not a 0. This means the lowest score a burger can possibly get is a 7. 7 is a pity score for 0. So instead of possibly giving, say Dairy Queen a 2 out of 20, we give them those 7 extra points just for burger spirit, and pumps it up to a 9 out of 27.
Let's break down this burger and get into why this is the worst tasting burger of my journey so far, and maybe ever.
The Beef: I peeled open the bun and looked at the beef patty which did not have any pattern you've ever seen on a piece of beef. It was clearly stored in a steamer/microwave to keep it warm, which proves that the "Grill" in Grill & Chill is a lie. The beef tasted like a failing grade of beef. It was lukewarm, dry, and mushy when chewed. The beef was clearly a 1 out of 4 to look at and to taste.
The Bun: The bun had been pressed in by the waitress' thumb who must have been holding it like it was a stress ball as she carried it over to our table (when she threw it down in front of me, but we'll get into that later). Besides the thumbprint, the bun was a basic bun. Soft on the inside, stale on the outside. Another 1 out of 4.
The Beef to Bun Ratio: The BTBR consisted of a single patty which was not too small for the bun, but definitely not large enough. One of the few categories this burger exceeds the minimum rating is right here. The BTBR gets a 2 out of 4.
Presentation: Let's get back to that waitress. I ordered an Original Cheeseburger and a Mint Oreo Blizzard. The Mint Oreo Blizzard came out first, they turned it upside down because apparently that's something they have to do (otherwise it is free), then turned it right side up and served it to me. The burger came a few minutes later. I found it odd that everyone around me had burgers in open cardboard containers and on trays. My burger...was wrapped in paper, and I saw its entire trip from counter to table. The waitress picked it up, tossed it back and forth, from hand to hand, reached my table, and Frisbee'd the burger into the center of the table. Seriously? After playing catch with my food, you're going to throw it down in front of me? I felt like Ickey Woods had just served me my food. I unwrapped it, and that's where the real fun began. The condiments were squirted onto, near, and around the burger like it was some Spin Art project from the 1990's. Needless to say, this presentation receives a 1 out of 4.
The Cheese: The cheese which was not melted and unevenly placed on the sorry excuse for a patty. The cheese was a typical 1 out of 3 fast food cheese.
The Sear: Ha. 1 out of 3.
Overall Taste: Dairy Queen does something I have yet to seen from any fast food chain in New York. Dairy Queen puts mustard on their burgers! That's right! Even in New York there is ketchup AND mustard, which I respect, because it is so ethnocentric of New Yorkers to say that burgers should only have ketchup when the rest of the country has mustard. Because of the mustard, I bumped this burger up to a 2 out of 5, for pity points.
My advice...Chill, don't Grill.
BBSR: 9 / 27
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