Burger 29: P.S. Burgers' P.S. Paris

From what I can assume based on my preliminary detective skills, P.S. Burgers opened in January of 2012.  Currently, there are two locations.  One location is in West Village, New York, and the location I visited was situated in Mineola, New York.

The options of burgers are beef, bison, turkey, chicken, veggie, lamb, and salmon, but let's be honest, burgers are made of beef.  Everything else is just an impostor.

The theme of the menu goes hand-in-hand with the name of this small burger joint which comfortably seats twenty-four people at eight tables.  Each menu item, begins with "P.S." which gets somewhat repetitive quite quickly, and finishes with a country or city in the world.  The P.S. Venice is a burger with sautéed mushrooms, caramelized onions, gorgonzola, and pesto sauce.  The P.S. Mexico contains a fried jalapeno, avocado, pepper jack cheese, and chipotle sauce.  The P.S. Canada has Canadian bacon, caramelized onions, maple goat cheese, tomato, and mixed greens.

Something I admire about this place is that each burger is something totally different and unique from the next burger.  It is not just a different combination of the same five toppings that makes different burgers here, but a whole new set of toppings that all work together and coincide with the theme of the restaurant and also name of the burger.

One thing, however, that irked me while I sat down to eat, was the name of the restaurant itself.  The entire time I ate I thought of different letters people compose to each other and how they end.

Example 1:
"The Statue of Liberty tour was amazing, I can't wait to see the Freedom Tower tomorrow! 
Love, Abigail
P.S. I miss you."

Example 2: 
"We will be joining with 15,000 more troops tomorrow in Iraq, then it will be only 8 short weeks until I am home with you.
Love, Private Ryan
P.S. I love you."

And then there's this...

Example 3:
"Until we see each other again, I will always be thinking about you.
Love, Daniel
P.S. Burgers."

I do admit it would be a boss move to end a letter with "P.S. Burgers" but it makes no sense whatsoever.  Creative, but not well thought out.  Anyway, the burger I ordered was the P.S. Paris.

P.S. Paris: Beef burger patty, topped with fried egg, sautéed spinach, gruyere cheese, smoked bacon and Dijon honey mustard, served on a brioche bun.

The Beef: I believe the perfect place to begin reviewing this burger is with the beef.  The ratings and ravings only go up from there.  The beef patty was clearly a pre-made patty, most likely frozen until cooked, and grilled until done.  The beef itself had the pre-formed, processed texture where the outside of the patty actually tastes a whole lot different than the inside because the inside hasn't been exposed to the freezer for nearly as long.  2 out of 4.

The Bun:  When I say soft, I mean soft.  I mean this brioche bun (which is usually dense and very bready) was soft and fluffy.  How soft and fluffy was this bun?  If I had a choice of jumping in a pile of pillows, leaves, or these brioche buns, I would pick the brioche ten times out of ten.  Softest, fluffiest bun so far, yet they realize this and compensate by toasting the inside to prevent it from getting soggy from the burger juices.  3 out of 4.

The Beef to Bun Ratio:  While my mouth just perfectly fit around this burger it wasn't because of the beef.  This is where this rating gets tricky because any larger amount of beef would have made this burger unbearably large.  So does one take off toppings and put on more beef?  After all, it is a burger.  I am confused how to rate this burger given the circumstances and going strictly beef to bun, it receives a 2 out of 4.

The Presentation: The burger was served on a plate with a wooden spear toothpick holding everything together.  The fries, spilling over the plate were enough to make it appear as though there were a mound of crispy fried potatoes before you.  3 out of 4.

The Cheese:  The double slice of Gruyere was a nice touch to this already stacked burger.  Although, the cheese could have been melted a little more (as seen in the picture), having gruyere instead of classic American was a nice change for the taste buds.  2 out of 3.

The Sear: The burger had lines seared into the patty, but other than that the sear was not consistent enough to be a perfect 3.  The seasoning on top of the outside sear made this burger a solid 2 out of 3.

Overall Taste: This burger contained so many different tastes and textures, yet somehow they all joined together to give you the P.S. Paris.  No single taste overpowered the other.  The sautéed spinach was a nice green to top the burger with.  The spinach was super fresh, buttered, and tasted amazing.  I would eat more of this spinach in one sitting than Popeye ate in a year if given the opportunity.  The bacon was perfectly cooked.  Crunchy with a little chewy fat marbled throughout made the flavors explode in your mouth.  The egg was fried, the yolk barely runny, but just enough for it to trickle down to the rest of the burger after the first bite.  The Gruyere cheese gave the nice mild taste, while the Dijon honey mustard supplied your sweet kick to the palette.  This burger was a 4 out of 5.

BBSR: 18 / 27

Burger 28: Bobby's Burger Palace Crunchburger

Bobby's Burger Palace is a fast casual chain restaurant established in July 2008 by the culinary legend, Bobby Flay.  The first location was located at Smith Haven Mall in Lake Grove, New York.  As of 2015, there are eighteen locations that range from New York, to Las Vegas.  In addition to these eighteen locations, Bobby also owns Mesa Grill (Las Vegas and Bahamas), Bar Americain (New York and Connecticut), Bobby Flay Steak (Atlantic City, NJ), and Gato (New York).  

Walking into Bobby's Burger Palace, I immediately noticed the tables.  Instead of many individual tables, there are only a few tables.  Some long and straight, and some long and curved.  People sit wherever they choose, which could be right next to total strangers, or it could be at a section of a table by themselves (depending on how crowded it is).  

On each of the tables are some not so ordinary sauces available to put on your burger.  There is the traditional ketchup and mustard, and then some more creative ones.  The chipotle ketchup is a worth a shot, ketchup mixed with a smoky barbecue sauce worked very well with the french fries.  The jalapeno hot sauce delivered a nice kick that wasn't too spicy, and tasted great with anything it was put on top of.  And finally, there was burger sauce.  The burger sauce comes in a darker bottle, comes out almost black, and has a funky taste.  If you're up for adventures, try the burger sauce!   

Each order is placed at the counter and a number is given to the customer.  The food is then cooked to order, and brought out to the designated number stands on each table.  There are various different burgers named for different cities, such as the L.A., Dallas, Carolina, Philadelphia, and Vegas to name a few.  Each burger has its own unique twist to allow itself to stand out from the others.  Like every great burger place, there is the burger that the place (or palace, in this case) is especially known for.  Bobby's Burger Palace is home to the Crunchburger.

Crunchburger:  beef patty, topped with double American cheese and potato chips

The Beef:  The beef, cooked medium, was pink around the edges and a hint of red in the center.  The tastes that emanated throughout this patty was remarkable.  Especially being a chain restaurant, the seasonings and juiciness of this burger was outstanding.  The burger was, I believe, a pre-portioned or pre-shaped burger, which takes away from each patty's uniqueness.  3 out of 4.  

The Bun:  The burger was served on a sesame seed bun.  Nothing special here about this bun except the cooks did take the time to toast it to give it a pleasant crunch.  2 out of 4. 

The Beef to Bun Ratio:  The patty was thick, which is unusual for chain restaurants, but I wouldn't expect anything thinner than this patty from Bobby.  Bobby is a man who knows what size burger the average human craves, and Bobby is a man who knows good proportions of beef to bun.  Bobby gets a 3 out of 4 for the BTBR.  

Presentation: The burger came on a separate plate from the fries (I also had to order them separately, so it only makes sense).  There was an oversized toothpick holding the burger together, ensuring that the burger stayed in place from the kitchen to the table.  The fries were served in their own dish, with a side of sauce made especially for the fries.  3 out of 4. 

The Cheese:  The burger used basic yellow American cheese but the cheese was perfectly melted around the entire outside of the burger.  A perfect rating for yellow American cheese would be when bitten into you see the yellow strings clinging from burger to mouth and do not want to let go.  The cheese was amazingly melted, but there were no stringy-cheese-melts.  2 out of 3.

The Sear:  The burger contained a grilled look, containing parallel grill marks on both sides of the burger.  Unless these lines were painted on (like the grilled chicken at Subway), which I am 100% confident they were not, this sear was done very well, along with all the seasonings in and around the patty.  2 out of 3. 

Overall Taste:  The burger does not have to be a monstrous burger with 57 toppings to have a great overall taste.  Some burgers may have that great taste containing only a slice of cheese and some Heinz 57.  This burger, with that added crunch of potato chips, really wowed me.  Something so simple to give that contrasting texture with the soft meat, bread, and cheese, made the burger an entire different experience for ingestion.  The melted cheese, the tasty, juicy burger, and the crunch of potato chips with each bite made this burger a solid 4 out of 5.

BBSR: 19 / 27  

Burger 27: Jake's Wayback Burger Triple Triple

The first Jake's Burgers opened in 1991 in Newark, Delaware. Serving handcrafted burgers and milkshakes, the owners saw the opportunity to expand and seized it.  Today, the name is Jake's Wayback Burgers, reminding people that they can still receive a quality burger (not like those hockey puck frozen burgers served at many fast food chains), like "way back" in the earlier years of operation.  Operating over 80 different locations today, Jake's Wayback is a very successful fast casual chain.

On my way to Jake's I was prepared to get a normal double cheeseburger, maybe a triple if I was feeling crazy.  I must have went out of my mind, and should have been sent to the mental asylum for what I ordered.  A friend of mine told me before I went that if I went to Jake's Wayback, I had to get the Triple Triple.  I thought this was something he made up, so I shrugged it off and focused on my double cheeseburger.  I walked inside the restaurant and standing before me was a six foot cardboard cutout of the massive Triple Triple (not actual size...but close).  If this is their selling tactic it definitely worked on me.  I walked in expecting to eat two patties, and walked out having ate NINE patties.  Nothing says give me a heart attack like eating a nine patty burger, with each of the patties cooked in a half inch of grease.  

Let us examine the monstrosity of the Triple Triple...

Triple Triple: 9 patties, 9 slices of American cheese, lettuce, tomato

The Beef: Of these nine patties, zero of them were ever frozen.  The meat comes in pre-sized "balls" of ground beef, which are placed on the flat top and smashed flat, then cooked to amazingness.  The fat ratio in this meat must be high because of the amount of grease that these patties were producing.  The taste was the taste of a nice, delicious, greasy, burger that you expect when you go to a chain restaurant.  3 out of 4. 

The Bun:  No bun could contain this burger.  But it was a typical white bread bun, not toasted, but then again, nothing could be done to this bun to hold the weight of this burger.  1 out of 4. 

The Beef to Bun Ratio: How do I begin to evaluate this burger?  It is a beef to bun ratio.  So we technically have way more beef than bun, but does this mean the perfect burger has this much meat? No.  I cannot determine a rating for this burger, because sadly, there is such a thing as too much meat.  It didn't kill the burger by putting nine patties on it, but it didn't help its cause either.  While most would expect this burger to receive a 4 out of 4, this burger will receive a 3 out of 4.  

The Presentation: The manager came out of the back and made me this creation himself.  He grilled the burgers and supervised as the young lady placed the 9 cheeseburgers on the single bun.  She placed three at a time on the spatula, and held them over a corner of the grill to allow the excess grease to pour out.  She placed the three patties on the bun, and the manager instructed her to fix them since they appeared to him to be a fraction of a millimeter off the center of the bun.  She did this twice more until my tower of nine cheeseburgers was ready to be topped with the second bun, lettuce, and tomato.  The perfectly balanced creation was then wrapped up and delivered to my hands.  The methodical process in which the manager and worker handled this situation made me think that these two should be sculpting masterpieces of art, and not building burgers.  But hey, I don't blame them for wanting to build a perfectly aligned, massive burger.  3 out of 4.

The Cheese:  The cheese was yellow American, but perfectly melted between each patty releasing the ooey gooeyness within each patty and, in turn, within each bite.  2 out of 3.

The Sear:  Each of the nine patty was made fresh from ground beef which was flattened into a patty on the grill before me.  Each patty had a distinct sear, and a great texture.  2 out of 3. 

Overall Taste:  These are the tastes I experienced while biting into this burger.  Ready?  Here we go... Bread, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Meat, Grease, Cheese, Bread.  Maybe a hint of lettuce and tomato.  2 out of 5.

BBSR: 16 / 27

Burger 26: Burger Bite's Titan Burger

Burger Bite, located in West Hempstead, New York, opened in June 2009, with one mission in mind...to re-create your backyard burger.  Pulling into this establishment, and walking inside, I had a genuine feel that this place could have great potential.  I looked up at the menu and couldn't decide which burger to get.  

The Cowboy Bite features sautéed  mushrooms, caramelized onions, provolone cheese, and barbecue sauce.  The Kickin' Spice Bite is topped with jalapeno peppers, pepper jack cheese, lettuce, tomato, and buttermilk ranch.  The interesting Big-Mash Bite has a homemade mashed potato on top.  I couldn't decide, nor would I allow myself to decide Burger Bite's fate by taking the risk of choosing the wrong one, so I put their fate in the cashier's hands.  She suggested the Titan Bite.  

The Titan Bite: Gourmet onion rings, crispy bacon, lettuce, American cheese, special sauce

The Beef:  When I think of a backyard burger, I think of a hand-packed wad of beef that is flavorful, thick, and juicy.  Though this burger might have been handmade like Burger Bite claims, it had the taste of one of those hockey puck frozen patties you often see at diners.  I could not tell the difference between this patty and ones I have experienced at various diners.  The beef did taste good, but the beef could have been a much greater quality.  2 out of 4. 

The Bun: The bun was fresh out of the package, and you see the bags and bags of burger rolls peeking from the kitchen.  No toasting, no browning of any kind.  The bun went from bag to plate, which sort of made it lack its full potential for a bun.  2 out of 4. 

The Beef to Bun Ratio:  The BTBR on this burger did this burger justice.  The size of the patty, compared to the size of the bun lined up on par.  What makes a great burger is not being afraid to use a proper amount of meat on the patty.  3 out of 4.  

The Presentation: I was asked if my burger was "to stay" or "to go" and even after I said "to stay" they insisted on wrapping it up as if it were "to go".  I suppose Burger Bite wraps all of its burgers because they know the feeling of unwrapping a burger is like unwrapping a present on Christmas morning.  The toppings were placed all contained inside the bun, but besides that, there was not much else going on.  2 out of 4.  

The Cheese: The yellow American cheese stared at me, as it has so many times on this journey.  I do not have a problem with using the cheap squares of yellow American.  I love it.  But if you aren't going to make sure it is melted on that burger, then don't put it on.  The cheese has a completely different taste and texture when melted versus when it is not melted.  In this case, this cheese fell short.  1 out of 3.

The Sear:  These burgers are chargrilled to maximize that "backyard" experience.  If these burgers were handmade and not once-frozen-discs the chargrill would be on point, however, it creates an entire different taste when grilling frozen patties.  The sear was visible, and the lines branded into this beef looked very nice.  2 out of 3.  

Overall Taste: The taste of this burger encompassed everything it advertised.  The American cheese, the lettuce, and the special sauce were all clearly imminent in the burger.  Then on top of these toppings there were onion rings, where each bite contained the crunch of the deep-fried breading, and the snap of the onion within, and the crispy bacon, which might have been the best part of this sandwich.  The bacon was flavorful, crispy, and tasted like it was made on your stove at home on a Sunday morning.  This burger was a very solid 3 out 5.  

BBSR:  15 / 27

Burger 25: The Texas Ranger's Ranger "Special' Burger

I'm going to begin this post a little differently.  I'm going to take this mini-franchise's story straight from the website and use that to base this post...

"The Texas Ranger of Freeport NY has been a family staple in communities across Long Island for decades. We are proud to inform you that we use 100% Fresh All Natural USDA Certified Beef.

Our secret? It's not one, admittedly. The best ingredients is a big part. An unrelenting love for the burger is the other big part. Between those two, we pretty much have our burger bases covered.

Turns out we also like people, though. We're not making these delicious, one-of-a-kind burger creations to not share them with our human species brethren. We hope to share them with you, in fact. And soon. So head on in to the nearest (heck, it could even be the furthest) The Texas Ranger location and feast your eyes on the greatest burger ever made. You won't be sorry you did."

Let's focus particularly on the last part...and feast your eyes on the greatest burger ever made...false.  You won't be sorry you did...also, false.  Look at the picture I took of my burger.  Is that appetizing? Do you even see a burger under that gallon of mayo (or "special sauce" as they call it)?  I don't.  I tried looking for it.  I felt like Stanley Yelnats from Holes digging through the mayo to get to the burger.  And when I finally reached the patty, it wasn't all that rewarding.  

Let's take a closer look...

Ranger "Special" Burger: Topped with shredded cabbage, tomato, onion, Special Sauce, and special seasoning.  

The Beef:  The beef was almost impossible to isolate from the mayo, but I managed to save a piece as it was drowning in the lard substance and see what kind of beef this place was using.  100% Fresh All Natural USDA Certified Beef.  "100% Fresh" means the beef is not growing mold on it.  "All Natural" is stating that they are using beef and not some chemical compound.  "USDA Certified Beef" does us no good, because Taco Bell is "USDA Certified Beef", heck, dog food is certified by the USDA as well.  2 out of 4. 

The Bun:  The bun was not toasted, taken straight from the package, and put onto the plate (or aluminum foil).  It was a white bread bun, with no redeeming qualities...the equivalent to using a potato roll.  1 out of 4.  

The Beef to Bun Ratio: Biting into this burger was a challenge, I must admit.  Staring down the mayo (excuse me, "special sauce"), I dared myself to do it.  I told myself, "Burger Bill, after these 100 burgers, you'll most likely be dead anyway. Why not speed it up by ingesting inordinate amounts of mayo?"  I winced, closed my eyes and took a bite.  Surprisingly, the mayo burger had beef on it.  2 out of 4. 

The Presentation:  The presentation really irked me.  Look at the picture.  Does it look like something you'd order?  Does the amount of mayo on that burger make you say, "Ooh la la"? If you had picture choices, is that the first one you would point to and want to eat?  Me neither.  But this burger is spot on how The Texas Ranger advertises its burgers.  The picture on the right is taken from The Texas Ranger's website.  If you were planning on putting a picture up of your product, wouldn't you at least make it look appetizing?  I'd be ashamed to put up a picture like this and then expect to draw a crowd based on this burger.  You don't even see a burger! 1 out of 4. 

The Cheese:  There was a slice of yellow American cheese barely melted on top of this burger.  1 out of 3. 

The Sear:  Scraping the mayo off the burger to examine its outside, I discovered the edges had been seared from the flat-top grill they were cooked on.  However, the top and bottom of the patty had no such sear.  2 out of 3.  

Overall Taste:  I was hesitant to take a bite of this burger, and it did not contribute to my assumed growing health situation.  But underneath the mayo (mind me, "Special Sauce"), the burger wasn't terrible.  It looked terrible, but it did not taste terrible.  I would give this burger a 2 out of 5.  

BBSR:  11 / 27

Burger 24: Eat Gastropub's 50/50 Burger

Eat Gastropub, located in Oceanside, New York, opened in early August of 2014.  The restaurant and bar is very modernized and sophisticated when it comes to presentation of the food and of the establishment.  There are 24 taps all in a line along the back wall of the bar, which is excellent since no taps are blocking customers from the bartender.  If you are planning on going here with a group of more than four, definitely make a reservation, regardless of the night of the week.

The menu is apparently available in the restaurant only.  I say this because I was planning on mentioning a few menu items, but the menu is no where to be found online.  The gastropub's website is "under construction" but if this place was opened almost a year ago, the website should be functional and we should not be resorting to their Facebook page to see posts of their brunch menu and guys sticking up their middle fingers (check it out, you'll see it).

The 50/50 Burger: 10 ounce blended beef patty (50% bacon, 50% house-ground, grass-fed, Piedmontese beef), topped with cheese, and crispy potato sticks, served on a pretzel roll.  

The Beef:  After inquiring with the waitress, the bacon is cooked before mixed in with the beef.  I asked how it should be cooked, and was told medium was the way to go.  The burger came out and medium tasted like well-done.  The combination of the pre-cooked bacon, mixed with the very lean ground beef, did not give off the taste of a great burger.  It was a bold strategy for them, but I don't know how well it paid off.  The beef was dry, and very grainy as it fell apart with each bite.  Although the grade of beef was excellent, the taste did not satisfy its demand.  3 out of 4.

The Bun:  The bun was a pretzel roll which was not too thick, and very well-toasted on the inside.  The subtle hint of soft pretzel was nice with this burger, since a normal bun would have been weighed down and crushed by a ten ounce burger.  3 out of 4.

The Beef to Bun Ratio:  This ratio was excellent.  The bun plays a huge part, as does the beef (obviously), but as I said before the bun really made this ratio something special.  Any more beef on this burger would have made it overwhelming.  Any less bun with this burger would have agreed with my previous statement.  This is the golden burger ratio of all golden ratios.  4 out of 4.

The Presentation:  I was looking for something crazy to give the first perfect presentation to, and this is it.  The burger came out on a cutting board with the Eat logo branded onto the board.  I like the cutting board idea because your food is not contained in a certain area, there is no lip or edge holding your food in one place.  It gives an entire new aspect of food presentation by eliminating something that is almost seen everywhere.  There is some sort of pipe that protrudes from the cutting board and inside the pipe-like structure is a piece of paper rolled into a cone-shaped container for the fries.  The fries sit in the this container very nicely and take up virtually no space on the plate (since they are elevated in the air, see picture).  The toppings are served in two ladles on the cutting board instead of only on a plate, or in a plastic container.  The presentation was definitely well-thought out, and is very different than anything I have ever seen.  4 out of 4.


The Cheese: For a ten-ounce burger, one slice of cheese was not enough.  It wasn't even decipherable through the taste of the bun, meat, and crunchy toppings.  It took extra work to even find it underneath the bun.  I was not impressed by the amount of cheese.  2 out of 3.

The Sear:  The sear here was just okay.  It was seared well in some places, and not so well in others.  The outside was under-seasoned, hoping the bacon extravaganza would pay off.  It did not.  2 out of 3.

Overall Taste:  I really couldn't get past the fact concerning how dry this burger was.  And I wasn't alone.  There were five of us.  Four of us ordered the ten-ounce 50/50 burger.  All of us received dry burgers, lacking the juice you expect to pour forth after your first bite.  It did taste great, but I'm going to have to bump this rating down to a 3 out of 5 because the main part of the burger, was essentially ruined.

BBSR: 21 / 27

Burger 23: Point Ale House's Black and Blue

The Point Ale House, opened in 2014, is located in the quaint hamlet of Point Lookout, New York.  With twenty-one taps, and equally as many flat screens, this restaurant is very comfortably situated on the corner of the main road.  Below "Steakhouse Burgers" on the menu is a phrase that reads, "Best on Barrier Island". 

Rule of Thumb: If the establishment does not have "burger" in its title, or it is not a recognized chain, then I visit these establishments off of referrals.  I am more than pleased with this referral since the burger was absolutely incredible. 

Black & Blue: Cajun dry rub, blue cheese

The Beef:  The juicy, gigantic, serving of beef was crushing the bottom bun with its overwhelming size.  Cooked medium, the center was perfectly colored, and tasted amazing.  The juices oozed out as each bite was taken, and as my arteries clogged just a little bit more, my stomach looked up at me and smiled.  3 out of 4.

The Bun:  The burger was served on a brioche bun.  The bun was toasted to perfection on the inside, however it was cut a little unevenly since the bottom bun was considerably smaller than the top bun.  3 out of 4.

The Beef to Bun Ratio:  Any other bun would have given this burger a perfect rating.  Since the brioche is so thick and dense, it bumps this BTBR down a notch to a 3 out of 4, since the bread slightly overtook the beef.

Presentation: The amount of pleasure this burger contributed to my pupils caused them to dilate tenfold and stare at amazement at this burger.  The fries were served in a mini deep fryer basket, and the burger served...on one of those trendy metal trays, which I still don't see the fascination with.  3 out of 4.

The Cheese: The crumbled and creamy bleu cheese on this burger, was placed over the top of this burger and then broiled until the cheese browned on top of the burger.  This bleu cheese was done correctly.  3 out of 3.

The Sear: The sear on a burger of this magnitude is difficult to accomplish, yet Point Ale House did a pretty decent job.  The outer edges of this burger were browned and in some cases blackened and wonderfully seasoned.  The top and bottom was lightly seared, and could have been a little darker, and crisp.  2 out of 3. 

Overall Taste: I started off thinking, "Hmm...I'll eat most of this burger," which instantly turned into, "Where did my burger go?"  The mouthgasms associated with this burger were on a high level of excellence.  Each bite was delicious, and to find such a great tasting burger in an unexpected place is the true definition of happiness.  4 out of 5. 

BBSR: 21 / 27

Burger 22: The Allegria Cocktail Cheeseburger

...Because I had to.  

The Allegria Hotel, under the same management since 2012, sits on National Boulevard in Long Beach, New York.  The venue, often used for parties, weddings, events, and any special occasion, has multiple party rooms including a rooftop lounge with a pool.  

I was the guest at a wedding recently and during the cocktail hour the waiter was walking around with miniature cheeseburgers.  I stepped into the phone booth, and Burger Bill stepped out with his cape waving in the wind.  He walked up to the waiter, and grasped a toothpick which was speared through the smallest cheeseburger he has ever seen.  
  After examining the lunch and dinner menus, they do in fact have a cheeseburger.  Although the lunch burger is 8 ounces, and the dinner burger is 12 ounces, yet they are both $18.00 it was a little confusing to me.  So since this is not one of the stops on my burger journey, I will stick with the less than 1 ounce cheeseburger before us (I had three to make sure the review was accurate).  

The Beef:  The beef was hand-formed into the smallest patties one could imagine.  It was the verge of a being a small meatball rather than a burger patty. The beef was seasoned and juicy, cooked medium, and tasted great. 3 out of 4.

The Bun:  The bun was two flat slices of bread.  Could have fooled me by using croutons.  The bun was really there just for show to give off the impression of a cheeseburger.  We all know that you would need at least 40 of these bad boys to even make a dent in my appetite.  1 out 4.

The Beef to Bun Ratio:  Since the bun was flat, this created a nice beef to bun ratio.  Every bite had a good amount of beef and the right amount of bun.  That last sentence was obviously facetious.  The burger only lasted one bite.  3 out of 4.

The Presentation:  The chef had to cook these mini cheeseburgers, then cut the little squares of cheese (we'll get to that), then squirt a teaspoon of ketchup onto these microscopic bread coverings.  Spear a toothpick through to hold it all together, it would have taken me a good 30 seconds to put this together.  The chef had to put trays of these together and serve them before they cooled to room temperature so many props are given to you, O Chef.  3 out of 4.

The Cheese:  First you take a slice of yellow American.  Next, you cut it into sixteen squares.  Then, you use these sixteen squares of cheese for sixteen different burgers.  Finally, voila! You have the world's smallest cheeseburger.  1 out of 3.

The Sear:  How does one even sear a burger of this size? Were they broiled? Sautéed? Cooked in a wok? All of these are possibilities, yet the sear was there, and it was distinct.  The firm, hardened outer core, with the pink/red center, was a sear to perfection.  3 out of 3.

Overall Taste:  The overall taste, for the few enjoyable seconds it lasted qualified this little guy for a 3 out of 5. 

BBSR: 17 / 27

Burger 21: Sonic Cheeseburger

The first Sonic Drive In was opened in 1959 in the little town of Shawnee, Oklahoma, with the fitting slogan, "Service with the Speed of Sound".  Today, the chain has expanded to 3,561 restaurants, and the new slogan, "This Is How You Sonic".  The infamous commercials featuring TJ and Pete, are quite possibly (in my mind), the best fast food commercials ever made.  The two grown men are always sitting in the drive-in stall of a Sonic always thinking up new ways to advertise menu items in a creative way.  If you haven't seen Sonic commercials, visit YouTube...right now.

I actually just convinced myself to YouTube a Sonic Drive In commercial and wound up watching the 12 minute compilation of about 20 commercials, all worth it, each commercial featuring a different menu item and/or honoring a different obscure day of the year from the summer solstice, to tax day, to opening day in baseball.  Seriously, go watch.

I pulled up to a drive-in stall (actually the last available one) and looked at the menu.  So many choices.  The burger was obvious, but I didn't drive 20 miles just to get a burger (well actually I did).  So in addition to driving 20 miles for a burger I added on to my order mozzarella sticks, Ched R Peppers, tater tots, popcorn chicken, a cherry limeade, and an Oreo milkshake.  Always trying to eat healthy, you know?  The burger was first and foremost on my list, and this is what I thought...

Sonic Cheeseburger: beef patty, American cheese, lettuce, tomato, pickles, onions, ketchup, on a white bread roll.  

The Beef:  As the carhop skated over to my car and stopped outside my window, she handed me a bag containing a Sonic Cheeseburger.  What she did not know was that she was handing over a menu item that was about to be reviewed by Billy's Burger Blog, the fastest growing blog on the internet.  Maybe I made up the last statistic, but one day it might be true.  I opened the bag pulled out my amazing creation between two buns and took a bite.  I examined the burger.  For a fast food chain restaurant, the quality of the beef was better than many.  2 out of 4.

The Bun:  The bun was soft on the outside and toasted on the inside.  It was very fluffy (as you can tell from the picture), and made each bite give off the taste of bread and not a conglomerate of damp buns, condiments, and grease.  2 out of 4.

The Beef to Bun Ratio: The single patty burger had a bun which fit perfectly over the entire burger.  The thickness of the burger was lacking, as with most fast food chains, and so in order to optimize your BTBR, you should go for the double patty.  In the case of the single patty, this BTBR receives a 2 out of 4.

Presentation: Granted this burger was placed in a bag and then given to a person on roller skates to deliver it to my car, the burger stayed intact very well.  The toppings were spread out evenly, and the condiments applied very well.  2 out of 4.

The Cheese and Sear: We could combine these two ratings because neither one was outstanding.  The cheese was your typical fast food American cheese, and the sear was your typical fast food burger look.  I doubt that these burgers are cooked on a grill of any kind, but if they are the sear was definitely lacking.  1 out of 3 in both categories.  

Overall Taste:  The overall experience was brought up because of the crispness and fresh taste of the vegetables on the burger.  The crunchiness of the lettuce, pickles, and onions, really gave a great texture to the burger.  If this were a party in my mouth, the party would be rated a 2 out of 5.  The appetizers, drinks, and shakes on the other hand...amazing.

BBSR: 12 / 27